...Johanna Navas...
After Atticus passed away, I could not stop thinking about Johanna and needed to know how she was doing. And even though it was hard for me and Eric, we were happy that they were getting more time with their sweet little girl.
I called Marianne (one of our favorite Oncology nurses) to see if she could ask Nancy, Johanna's mom, for permission to keep me updated on Johanna's health. Thanks to her big heart, I have been kept in the loop, and am so grateful.
Nancy will text me every now and then with pictures of Johanna and updates here and there. But when I don't hear from her after a couple weeks, I get worried and call Marianne at the clinic to see how she's doing.
A little over a month ago, Johanna had her routine 3 mo. MRI. It showed tumor growth but she did not have any symptoms.
Sweet Johanna was hospitalized last week and released last Saturday. Her tumor is progressing at a "rapid speed." I wish this story had a different ending. It doesn't matter how many tears we shed, DIPG ends in the same tragic way.
The Oncology team feels that Johanna has maybe 2 months left before she joins Atticus and the other cancer fighting angels.
I found out Tuesday from both Marianne and Nancy. I was absolutely sick. And couldn't stop crying. I so badly wanted to close my eyes, cover my ears, and run far far away. I don't want Johanna to suffer, I don't want her family to suffer. I don't want them to go through the heart ache. Knowing whats to come brings back so many, very fresh, intense memories, and I hurt. For them and and I hurt for us.
Part of me wants to look the other way, but I know that if I don't try to support them as best I can I will regret it. That although it is SO hard right now, I don't want to look back and wish I had been strong enough to offer even the tiniest bit of support.
Every one's story and experience is different, but our cancer story ended not too long ago, and maybe just maybe, our experience will help ease their burden and strengthen both of our families.
SO... I am asking all of you, who have so diligently kept our sweet Atticus and family in your prayers to please pray for sweet Johanna and the Nava's family. Please pray for their strength during this trying time. Please pray for sweet 4 yr old Johanna to feel the comfort of our loving Savior. To feel the strength of her angel friends surrounding her. To peace in whats to come.
I am putting together a care package for Johanna and her family, and if you would like to participate, no pressure, send it my way. There are a few things I want to give her and her family... a few things that I wish I would have had the opportunity to do with Atticus, but our time ran out. Thing's like a stepping stone for a garden and recorded messages to each family member...
I would like to send it in 2wks, not knowing what the real time table is. I know it's a bit of a rush, but like I said no pressure. And it doesn't have to be anything major. Atticus loved getting letters and pictures, and I'm sure she would too.
We love you Johanna! Stay strong sweet girl. You are in our prayers. xoxoxo
10 comments:
She is darling. Just darling. Of course we will pray. So proud of you Cindy. You find the strength to reach out in the middle or your own heartache. You are one brave wonderful woman. Love and prayers to both of your families.
xoxoxo
Ang
Thanks, Cindy. I've wondered about Johanna since the last time you wrote about her. I'm glad she'd been well for so long. You are a good woman with such a tender heart. Will be praying!
God bless that sweet little girl, and this is why so many of us strangers love you and your family! When you could easily shy away from this because you just lost your sweet son , you are choosing to help this family because you know how much it means to do sonething like that. I have never met or heard of anyone like you and your sweet family! God Bless you and your husband and chunk!
Prayers are being sent. Hugs to you and your family, as well as to Joanna and her family.
God Bless you Cindy! You and Eric are such an inspiration and blessing to me and many others. Thank you so much for helping them they are such a humble and loving family.While at times I do not understand why God has put me in the lives of two very brave kids and two amazingly strong families I am so humbled and blessed to know that he has a master plan in it all.I also am trying to get somethings worked out on my end as well from my family and friends to bless them with some beautiful memories to help enhance every moment. God Bless you and all you do! Yall are in my hearts forever.
Misty
Oh Cindy! I can't imagine the memories that this brings. What an amazing person you are. Honestly. I know you aren't doing this for others to notice but we can't help but notice. Notice that during your hardest time you are lifting those around you, helping others. You are amazing. We will pray for Johanna too. We will always continue to pray for you and your family. Lots of Love.
We'll be praying for Johanna and her family.
Cindy, I am thinking of you tonight. I just read the "Cheering for Caitlyn" site I found through a friend's Facebook page, and it is a Mom writing about her 4 year old daughter who was diagnosed with DIPG on January 13, 2012. They are really struggling with the news they just received following being part of a clinical trial. I was thinking about you, Cindy, and knowing in a strange twist that you are probably one of the only Moms in this world who would want to trade places with that Mom since January 13th. Because you are grieving the loss of Atticus and she is still fighting the battle. As bad as things were sometimes, you wanted more, because some of that time was really wonderful time to know and love Atticus and help him serve his mission. God's blessings of peace to you and Caitlin's Mom and Johanna's Mom and all the other Moms who will have angels after the battles.
Will it never ever end? That sweet angel girl. I am so impressed you are able to find the time and energy to help this family. You are amazing and I am forever impressed by you. We will most definitely throw something in the mail by the end of this week.
On another note, I noticed you are signed up for the curesearch walk in salt lake! If you are coming and if you have the time, maybe we can get together and go to lunch one day. I would love to finally meet you in person.
You are still constantly in our thoughts and prayers. xoxoxo
Cindy,
I wanted you to know that I put Johanna and her family's names in the Bountiful Temple today. And we continue to pray for you and your sweet family, also. Hang in there. My husband told me when our son died, that there were no rules for getting through this. When you crumble, you just get up again. I think you are doing great.
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