Radiation Day 13... NOT

Thursday February 9th NO RADIATION. AGAIN. UGH! On our way to the hospital Eric and I said a prayer that all will go well today. That Atticus will be able to breath properly and receive treatment. God does answers prayers. We have many blessings that are proof of that. But for whatever reason, and only HE knows, treatment didn't work again. Even with the adjustments they made to his radiation mask and the larger breathing tube, the poor guy just struggles. They came out, told us that they couldn't do treatment, and that he was currently in the process of getting a new mask made. Once that is done they will start with his new radiation plan. They are hoping it won't take as long by having the first plan to assist them but to plan on NO treatment Friday or Monday either. That means no treatment for 4 days. The goal is to be ready by Tuesday but they'll call if it's not able to happen. Tears. Frustration. Dissapointment. I realize the tumor doesn't have a mind of its own, but it's kind of knowledge in the DIPG world after treatment, when the tumor has hopefully shrunk or stopped growing and you have had your given "happy" time, when the tumor starts to grow again, it comes back with a vengence. So my fear (hence the little break down in the office) was that the tumor was going to think that this break in treatment meant treatment was over. That it would start to grow and grow stronger and faster. Dr. Munoz talked with us (Eric and I have decided we're not big fans of him. At all). He said that the likelyhood of that happening is very rare. Blah blah blah. I don't really remember what else he said because I was too busy calling our AMAZING team of Oncology Doctor's and nurses who of course, told us to get our cute kiddo up there and "we'll talk!" Sorry, Dr. Munoz you got to step up your game. The Oncology Doctors are creaming ya in every aspect. 4th floor bound, Atticus in my arms, which isn't an easy tasks anymore :) and the confidence that our Oncology team was going to make this right. And they did. They calmed me and Eric's concerns. Gave us confidence that things happen for a reason and helped us reach our, " let's look at it as a little accesssed vacation" attitude. FIVE day's of not being accessed!! One of our concerns was if this would happen again; Atticus gaining weight and the mask not fitting. Is there a possibility? Yes. Are they overly concerned? No. The steriods are so hard on anyone but especially the little ones. Obviously weight gain is inevitable but with us slowly lowering the amount of Decodron he is getting his weight will most likely stay the same or possibly go down a bit. But we'll cross that bridge if we ever come to it. We also talked about diet. Im not a super un-healthy person/mom but Im not super healthy either. I loooove to cook and bake and EAT! So my thought process is this, obviously we don't want to give Atticus fast food every day, but dang it, it the kid wants chicken nuggets and fries, and it will give him a little bit of comfort for the moment, hour, day... then buddy, chow down! Each meal I make him eat a fruit and vegetable. Push water. And we have started doing some "exerices." It is HIL-arious! As soon as I figure out how to upload the video's I have, prepare to laugh your booties off. Atticus could not be any cuter. It's seriously the cutest thing. Once de-accessed, Eric and Bethy (his sister) took the boys home and I went to the pharmacy. Im a frequent shopper now! Stopped by carter's to take advantage of their clearance winter wear and bought Mr. Atticus some larger stretchy-pants:) talked to one of my besties, shed a few tears, got's some awesome words of encouragement, and headed home. That's when the FUN began. First on the FUN menu: Checking out the many AWESOME valentine/hearts Atticus got! The Primary kids in our ward, "Heart-Attacked" Atticus the night before, but due to a crazy morning, I didn't open the blinds to show him. Until later... He was SO excited. And LOVED reading what each child friend and teacher had to say.

Have I mentioned that I LOVE our ward/church family? They have been absolutely positively amazing. For living far far FAR away from family, we coulnd't have asked for a better ward family. Second on the FUN menu: Wiggle bike. I cannot tell you how many times we have taken this thing down the alley. Atticus and I had a system. I would put Isaac down for one of his naps; Atticus would grab the monitor and we would meet by the garage door. Stick the monitor in my pocket and He and I would go up and down over and over. He loves it. I did too! This was the first time he's gotten on a "bike" in a month. His smile was priceless. I am SO grateful that his symptoms have taken a back seat so he can enjoy some of his favorite activities.

(Thank you neighbors we don't know for lettins us use your steep driveway!) While Atticus and I were waiting for Daddy and Bethy to turn the corner so they could see us go down, Atticus was yelling some silly things and making me laugh. Me: Atticus, you are cracking me up. Atticus: Im cracking myself up! We both laughed. Those are the moments that will be forever engraven in my heart and soul. Forever. Buddy, you always crack me up!

Third on the FUN menu: wagon ride!

After naptime, Bethany and I took the boys to Target so Atticus could pick out birthday present for Isaac... My baby is turning ONE. TOMORROW!! On the drive he asked me, "Mom? In the morning, do I stay home or go to the doctor?" When I replied stay home, he said, "YEAH!!! I get to eat food!" It was so funny! We decided cinnamon rolls should be on our Birthday breakfast menu! Also on the drive he tried to reach Isaac's hand while both in their car seats and said, "Isaac, I sure love you big boy!" My boys love eachother. TONS. It's a good mommy feeling. Our day ended with Pizza, and Uncle Chris coming. Eric's older brother. Atticus was so excited and showed him a million things and told him a million things! It's going to be a good weekend.